Really???

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot,
and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

George Carlin


(as seen while I was driving to the grocery store / Julie Cook / 2017)

People crack me up…
well….
let me correct that….
I admit… I’ve actually been known to also crack myself up…

But today it wasn’t me, it was people…as in the random people out on the road.

If you’re anything like me,
especially now during the start of this season known more for
its madness than for anything truly Holy, religious, spiritual or even grateful….
you’re in your car a lot—driving.

Driving to visit, driving to work, driving to shop—
driving wherever it is you drive.
As in you just seem to be driving more than perhaps you normally would…
In part because during “this” season it’s when we seem to need to go more places,
do more things and see more sights than we normally would or do…
it’s just what we do.

So early this morning as I made a dash to the store, I was stopped at a red light,
behind the car whose image is inserted above.

I usually enjoy reading the stickers folks put on their cars.
Entertaining mindlessness as one sits held captive.

Of course if the stickers are foul or profane,
of which I have seen plenty of stickers that are offensive in one way or another….
I’m none too amused…
and actually if the truth be told,
offended by the thoughtlessness of the more selfish among us….

Yet generally speaking, the stickers provide a bit of cheap entertainment, idle mind filler, thought-provoking wonderment, contemplation or even an audible “amen” …
this as I waste the 4 to 5 minutes of life sitting at red lights or hours stuck
in stop and go traffic.

I’ve always said you could tell almost everything about a driver
from the stickers on their car—-

Whether or not they are young or old,
male or female,
Southern or not,
a fan of a particular college,
a veteran,
a republican,
a democrat,
a member of the green party,
a member of PETA,
a music fan,
a former POW,
a Purple Heart recipient,
a school supporter,
a proud parent or grandparent,
a Christian,
an Atheist,
a Gay,
a dog lover,
a cat lover,
an adopting parent,
a Humane Society supporter,
a relative of or an actual cancer survivor…
whether or not they are athletic,
whether they are into sports,
whether they love electrical linemen,
whether they live on a farm,
whether they drink beer–and usually which brand….
whether they love adventure,
love to hike,
love to bike,
simply love,
simply hate,
whether they are a doctor,
a nurse,
a teacher,
a boy scout,
a girl scout,
an Eagle scout,
a Starwars fan,
and even a guess as to their name as their initials are actually monogramed on
their car’s window—-kind of like a throwback sweater but not.

It gives a good bit of insight into who it is driving the nearly 4000 pound vehicle
in front of you….a friend or foe sort of vibe.

So imagine my curiosity when I actually focused and read the sticker on the car
in front of me this morning.

Now I’ve seen stickers that warn that ‘in case of rapture this car will be driving
dangerously and erratically, all by itself,
so everyone left in their cars need to watch out’—
or what about those stickers that state that God is the driver’s co-pilot…
I think I’d rather prefer that to read, ‘God is the pilot,
I’m just along for the ride’….

But Zombie Response Squad??? Really???

Was I to assume that there was an actual zombie rescue person in the car
in front of me?
What exactly does that mean their responsibility will be in case of an attack?
Was I to find some sort of comfort in knowing that little fact of their
expertise in all things zombie?

This as I remember there’s actually a truck here in town, riding around with
some sort of machine gun, real or not I do not know,
mounted in the bed of the truck with signs posted on either side of the truck–
“Zombie Assault Vehicle”.
As I begin to wonder what sort of town do I actually live in……

Nervously I look up and down the road…left then right…
They eat brains right???

As in do people really think Zombies are going to attack?
That Zombies are actually real?
That Senoia, Georgia’s claim to fame…The Walking Dead are actually alive and…ummm…dead and questionably well down in that small southern town?

Is that why we hear tales of preppers?
Is that why we hear tales of those militia who are hiding out in the mountains
and woods?

Is there something going on that I don’t know about during this season of
all things mad and crazy??
Maybe that’s why it’s called “black Friday”…
it’s a Government coverup because it’s really about some sort of Zombie apocalypse…

This as I just read another story that someone out there is certain the whole moon
landing was faked….

Well, it tis the season…. or so they say…
and remember…I think I read that Zombies like fruit cake…
So best to leave those ubiquitous seasonal goodies now hitting the grocery store shelves
out on the lawn….just to be on the safe side….

May you and your family have a joyful, grateful and even a bit of the humorous
Thanksgiving eve—- πŸ™‚

You will be enriched in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God.
2 Corinthians 9:11

32 comments on “Really???

  1. hatrack4 says:

    I like fruit cake. Does that mean that I’m a zombie? Are zombies the last to know? If they are undead, do they know anything? I liked this post, but it is also disturbing!

  2. LOL! How funny, I live far from you and we have those same cars! We have a zombie attack vehicle too,complete with a machine gun looking thing.

    I often ponder the zombie obsession in this country. It’s kind of like we all sense there is an enemy out there,we just can’t quite figure out who or what.

    Happy Thanksgiving. πŸ™‚

  3. Wyldkat says:

    Hmm. I wonder what my “decorations” say about me.

    Daughters of the Nile badge (1 in 300 would recognize it) [Had an Eastern Star badge but it fell off.]
    Lady Vols license plate bracket + magnet on rear quarter panel.
    MIA/POW ribbon
    Thin blue Line Ribbon.
    TARDIS magnet on rear quarter panel.

  4. atimetoshare.me says:

    Oh it’s fun to see you share your silly side. You are indeed a riot. As far as the Carlin quote is concerned, I’ve hear that uttered many times as we travel together. You’d think he was the only one who knew how to drive. Happy Thanksgiving my friend. You made my dayπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜œπŸ—πŸ…

  5. ColorStorm says:

    All this from sitting at a red light? Now that’s a brain in overdrive J!

    Well done. as a side order, many smart people, engineers, pilots, etc etc, are convinced without a doubt that a man never set foot on the moon. Landing on a light and all that, and the fact that the ‘big shots’ said man can not leave earth’s orbit…..yet………..and that Kennedy said in a speech: ‘we will invent metal that can withstand the radiation………..’ and that and I quote: ‘We haven’t been back to the moon because we destroyed the technology…………….’ Huh???

    We shouldn’t be so quick to write people off as dunces because they have more knowledge that us. lol

    But I do like this post. πŸ˜‰ H-Thanksgiving btw.

  6. Reblogged this on Talmidimblogging and commented:
    πŸ™‚

  7. Lynda says:

    Hope your thanksgiving preparations go well and that you have some downtime. Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family tomorrow! (Just getting in my wishes today as tomorrow I’m at the university and might not have time.)

  8. Wally Fry says:

    Well like to say around here that the log truck in front of you is always going 20 mph while the one coming toward you is always going 120

  9. Oh, I do love your sense of humor! This is hilarious! Happy Thanksgiving, dear Julie. πŸ™‚ ❀

  10. Citizen Tom says:

    I have one of those Tea Party license plates. I suppose that to Liberal Democrats that means my brain has already been eaten.

    Oh well! At least I don’t have to worry about the Zombie Apocalypse anymore.

  11. davidkitz says:

    Happy Thanksgiving to you!

  12. Tricia says:

    Lol Julie! Not only do we have the Zombie thing going on out here but there 5k fundraisers dedicated to the apocalypse Nothing like seeing a bunch of Zombies in running tights gasping towards the finish line.

    Happy Thanksgiving Julie!

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