Birthdays, Ice Makers, and Medicare? part II

“I predict future happiness for Americans, if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them.”
Thomas Jefferson

Okay, so yesterday we left off with the rant of a poor husband who had just turned 65 and found out he had to pay for something he was forced to sign up for, against his better wishes, with no option of opting out–aka–Medicare.
The whole choice but no choice scenario
And we were left with the laughter of a thousand far off voices when he mentioned he thought Medicare was something the Government did for free for it’s “seniors”—not that he’s a senior.

And just as we begin to recover from his near apoplexy over receiving the initial Medicare bill, we pick up right where we left off. . .

I quickly call me aunt.
When all else fails, always call Martha. . .

“Yep, you pay”
“If he was drawing Social Security, it would come out of that, but since he’s not, hence the bill.”
We thought it was a free service.
Hysterical laughter now from the receiver of the phone.

The following morning, the bill was gone. My hope was that he carried it to work in order to pay it, otherwise I suppose I should be looking for us a new home, say in, Argentina or Bolivia. Isn’t that where you go when you need to hide out?

Let’s switch gears for a minute.
Since there was indeed a birthday and a rather memorable one at that, we need a present right?
A good present.
Enter the ice maker.

We have an LG refrigerator. LG refrigerators are known for having notorious dysfunctional ice makers. I even wrote the president of LG, just after we got the fridge, complaining. I was told we could call in a service order to request a replacement, of which I did. Number two ice maker was equally as poor.

Each evening I hear the same litany regarding “that sorry ice maker” and how a refrigerator he had back in 1920 made better ice then “that sorry thing over there”
Over there is against the wall in the kitchen and as for 1920, I exaggerate just a tad

When I was mulling what to get for his birthday, I had an ingenious thought!
A marvelous thought!
As in the best present ever sort of thought!
Enter the small portable ice maker!
Genius!

I did my homework.
I researched all the little ice makers I could find information on, reading reviews and consumer reports. I settled on a Smart Plus (Smart + )
I ordered it from Amazon.
I love Amazon but that’s for another day.

In a couple of days FedX pulls up to deliver the ice maker.
I put a bow on the box and wait for the big day.

On that special day marking the 65th year on the planet, I bring out the big box with the big bow.
“I told you not to get me anything, we need to save money and here you are buying presents. . .what is it?” as a smile forms on now a childlike face.

He digs into the box like only any kid would and could.
He finally realizes what it is . . “OH WOW–AN ICE MAKER” (you should be hearing childlike glee as you are reading)
We read the instructions and I explain that I’ll need to thoroughly wash it out and run a couple of test batches first in order to get that “made in China” smell and taste out of the machine—as in yes, it is indeed made in China.
He’s happy.
I’m happy.
It’s a good birthday.

The following day, I run out to the store in order to buy a couple of gallons of distilled water as I understand that distilled water makes for clear cubes. And yes, this machine is to make the round tube like cubes, not the half moon things he hates out of the refrigerator.

I plug it in, add the water, set the controls, wait a tad—then woosh, the little machine churns out water.
Ok, maybe it’s not cold enough yet.
Again Woosh, again water.
I feel around inside the little ice making tubes.
They are not cold.
Hummmmm. . .
Not cold at all.
Aren’t things like refrigerators, freezers and ice makers suppose to be cold?
Again, I reset the numbers.
Woosh, water.
Again, woosh, water.

WHAT??
AAAGGGGHHHH!

Wait a minute.
When you plug in a refrigerator, large or small, aren’t you suppose to hear a motor? A motor like in a compressor??
The freaking compressor is not coming on.
Are you freaking kidding me!!!?
At this point I think I kicked the open drawer by my foot which was open and housed my mixing bowls. I now have 4 less mixing bowls.

When my husband comes home, I break the bad news hoping that he’ll know how to make it work. Maybe I’m not plugging it in correctly?
He pittles with it and declares it to be indeed a dud.
The compressor will not come on.

AAAGGGGHHHHHHH!!!

I’m furious.
“Can you get your money back” he asks almost pleading for the affirmative.
“Yes danmnit” as I sadly put the thing back in the packing styrofoam and into the big box.
I contact Amazon.
They issue a packing mailer and I proceed to write a “to whom it may concern” letter to Smart +
lambasting an ice maker made in China. . .why can’t an American Company produce a product in America, using American ingenuity, putting Americans to work, where American workers take pride in producing quality American products???? What’s happened to this country???!!!!

UGH!!!

The perfect present goes back from whence it came via UPS.
The following day, I go to the mall in order to buy a back up present–the standard boring dress pants and shirts. Same ol same ol birthday goods–with these high end dress clothes, from a very reputable and long established high end American men’s clothier–with their very high end clothes being made in. . .wait for it. . . Malaysia.

(Picture my head hung very low) UGH!

Oh and did I mention that the insurance company sent out a giant booklet regarding the birthday boy now being a part of Medicare. And no, I couldn’t tell you if it is A, B, C, D, E, or F. . .
Seems that since he is now enrolled in Medicare, he’s no longer to use the doctor, his primary healthcare doctor, here in our town, he’s been using for almost the past 25 years–as Medicare says he must go elsewhere.

AAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Bolivia eh???

Birthdays, ice makers and Medicare?

“I grabbed a pile of dust, and holding it up, foolishly asked for as many birthdays as the grains of dust, I forgot to ask that they be years of youth. ”
― Ovid

(do not buy this. . .)

(Part I / because anything dealing with the Government has to have its own part. . . as its too lengthy a topic to be included with any other thought. . .)

Did you know that just about a year before one turns 65, one begins to receive an onslaught of mailers, adverts and junk mail regarding Medicare? And not that I would know about that–I will merely be turning 55 later this year, not 65. However I am receiving an onslaught of junk from AARP but I digress and that is for another story.

It is my dear sweet husband (he felt badly I painted him in such a bad light over that whole anniversary debacle and my near death experience with the yellow jackets of which he basically exposed me to—digressing. . .) who is turning (actually just turned last week) 65. . .
but shhhhh, don’t tell anyone because he really doesn’t want anyone to know or to be reminded because one never turns an age such as 65, that’s just for parents and grandparents. . .hummmmmmmm

And as he is not one for taking the time to know or learn about things such as Medicare, Medicaid, Obamacare, AARP, IRA, or RIP. . .as he’s consumed with the owning, operating and managing a small town retail business, trivial matters such as insurance, Federal, State and Local matters plus medical mumbo jumbo, etc, is left to me, the one who’s suppose to be able to figure such out while making perfect sense of it all.

Are you freaking kidding me!!?
I still have a hard time figuring out decimals and percents and now I’ve got to decipher something like Medicare?! Oh dear Lord!!!

The one fact I had gleaned from the tidal wave of Medicare mail was that I had to get him registered or so said our health insurance. As a teacher for the majority of my life, our insurance is what I carried through the school, which is in turn issued through the state. So it was the state insurance folks, who joined the litany of those mailing out sign up reminders, which basically gave me a small heads up.

Question.

Why does the Government feel the need to remind us that we’re reaching some kind of magic number on the age scale?
Why did they choose 65 as that magic age?
I thought 50 was the new 30. . .wouldn’t that make 85 the now magic Government age number on their magic age scale?
Why, if they seem to know you’re turning 65, do you have to sign up?
Can’t they just automatically sign you up, since they seem to know you’re supposed to be signing up anyway?
And why do we have to sign up?
Why is there no opting out?
No choice?
Didn’t somebody run on the platform of Choice?
Oh, my bad, that was Change–and we see where that’s all going. . .digress, digress, digress. . .
What happens if you didn’t want to sign up?
What’s wrong with the insurance you already have, that is if you have insurance and you like it?
Back to the change / choice business. . .

So many questions and so few answers.
This whole sign up but no opting out and being told to sign up sounds oddly familiar—
. . .use that generic foreign accent when thinking this. . .”Ve have vays of making you sign. . .”

Ok, so we keep getting these reminder cards from every insurance company under the sun including AARP, the NRA, the Democrats, the Republicans, the Tea drinkers, Starbucks, as if anyone and everyone is in countdown mode.
You have 6 months before your 65th birthday to sign up
You have 3 months before your 65th birthday to sign up
You have 1 month before your 65th birthday, you better as hell sign up—
Well maybe it wasn’t exactly stated like that but you catch the gist.

I made a little file folder.
I tried sorting out the real reminders and information from the fake adverts and scams.
I called our insurance company.
I went on line.
I pretended I was him. . .shhhh, don’t tell, it’s what wives do who have been married as long as I have.
I got him signed up.
Or so I guess.

Do you want part A, B, C, or D?
Oooo, choice. Now you’re talking. . .
You need part A and B but maybe not C.
If you get part C then you have part A and part B but now maybe you need D?
Maybe you need to add part D, that way you’ll have every part you ever thought you’d need but does that now exclude A?
What about Social Security.
What about Social Security?
It’s still there, right?
Will you draw Social Security?
Do you have existing insurance.
Do you work?
Do you want to work?
Does your spouse have existing insurance?
Do you have a spouse?

WHAT???!!!

Use this card until the other card comes.
What other card?
Use your old card with the new card.
What new card?
What old card?
Destroy those cards and now just use this card.
Which card?

WHAT??!!

A week passed.
A very official looking letter came addressed to my husband.
I opened it.
Shhhhhh, don’t tell, remember that’s what wives do.
You owe $325 for your medicare.

WHAT???

He comes home from work.
I slowly push the letter over in his direction.
“What’s this?” he quips
It appears to be a bill.
“A bill, a bill for what?”
Medicare.
WHAT?!!
expletive, expletive, expletive
YOU MEAN YOU HAVE TO PAY FOR MEDICARE??!!
Apparently so.
“This is a one time fee right?”
I don’t think so. . .
EXPLETIVE EXPLETIVE EXPLETIVE
“What do you you mean you have to pay?
We already pay for insurance, as it’s taken out of your check every month right?
Correct.
“You mean I’ve got to pay on top of that payment???” Double insurance?”
Apparently so.
“Well if that’s the case, I don’t want it.
Just sign me out.
I don’t want that.
I’m not paying for that.
What we have is just fine”

I don’t think it works that way. I don’t think you have a choice (I’m thinking maybe somebody out there might want to think about running on the choice slogan)
“The [expletive] I don’t, I’m not paying this.”
Then they’ll just come get you (you know who “they” are, right?)
“Well this isn’t right.”
“You need to call someone.”
“If this is the case, that much more a month and we’ll never [expletive] retire!”
“Are they crazy?” (Again, you know who “they” are right?)
“We can’t afford this.”
“Write about that on that blob of yours”
That would be bloG
“That’s what I said BLOB!”
Yes, your’e right— no time to disagree

“Is your dad paying?”
(What isn’t my 86 year old dad not paying for?!)
“I thought a person signed up and Medicare was something free, something the Government did for “seniors”, not that I’m a senior. . .”

Somewhere far away voices are laughing as in the joke he just made about the Government doing something free.
That’s a good one.

Stay tuned for part II tomorrow –remember there’s a story about an ice-maker in here somewhere.